
We are still waiting for test results, but I can't stop crying today.
Several months ago, we found out that Katy has a heart murmur and were told what to expect, but were also told there was no way to predict when to expect it. I innocently thought that was the worst thing, the not knowing.
Over the summer, she has had a never ending bladder infection. She kept seeing a different vet because they worked us in as quickly as possible, and each time they gave us medicine and a "wait and see" directive. I like all the vets there, but Dr. Kelleher has an intuitive talent for knowing when there is a real problem. Finally we were able to see him and he said we need to find out what's going on with Katy. He discovered what he calls polyps in her bladder. A few tests have been done that have ruled out the best outcomes and now we are looking for a possible cancer diagnosis. The first test came back inconclusive, so Friday he called me and asked if I could get her there right away to do another test so he could get it sent out by the end of the day, so that's what we're waiting on now.
When cancer was first mentioned, I thought we might be spared a long decline with her feeling badly and then the inevitable decision that would have to be made because of her heart condition. He had earlier told me her heart condition is not painful and she's not suffering from that. The growth in her bladder is at the opening. She struggles to pee and isn't very successful. Now, the best case would be that the growth is benign and we can shrink it with medication so she can pee.
The situation hit me hard last night. I realized she is already declining, but I was in denial attributing it to old age. Katy is around 10, that's the vet's best guess. We have switched to canned dog food for her. She misses many early morning meals, even though she will usually eat some of it around noon. She has lost some weight. We have the air conditioner on because the heat seemed to be
bothering her more. Last night I looked at her and knew she just doesn't feel well. Her tail wags less than it used to. If I have to decide when, that is going to be so hard, I can't even imagine right now.
I know there are some people who would roll their eyes and say "she's a dog." I don't care.
I know some people would totally understand this.
Katy had a rough start in life and was rescued in very bad shape by a wonderful woman who found her and took her home and gave her a new life. I came across her when I went to this woman's house for my job. I instantly fell for Katy when she looked at me with those eyes of hers and wagged her tail. My husband had been vetoing dogs for many years, but I wanted Katy. The wonderful woman told me she was a foster mom, I told her I had a fenced yard and we looked at each other and knew the right match was found. Husband agreed, and within a few days felt the same as I did about her. This happened after we had been through a rough patch ourselves and Katy was just what we needed around here. She has given us nothing but joy for the last 5 years. My heart is breaking.